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Why We Like ‘Dating’

I’m sure that the title of today’s post could bring up questions as simple as “What is Rasul talking about now?” The reason for this title is to demonstrate, by using the definition of the word ‘dating’ objectively, with the intent of showing the reader the value of defining words in order to make transparent our intentions when interacting with others. Do you have a date? By definition, this is ambiguous as it can imply more than one thing. ‘Date’ is defined as: (Noun) “The day of the month or year as specified by a number.”; “A particular day or year when a given event occurred or will occur.”; “The years of a person's birth and death or of the beginning and end of a period or event.”; “The period of time to which an artifact or structure belongs.”; “A social or romantic appointment or engagement.”; “A person with whom one has a social or romantic engagement.”; “A musical or theatrical engagement or performance, especially as part of a tour.”; (Transitive Verb) “Go out with (someone in whom one is romantically or sexually interested)”. (Lexico dot com Powered by Oxford)


Now intrapersonally, what is the first thing that comes to your mind when you hear the word ‘dating’? In the eight definitions posted above, where did what came into your mind fall in the above order? My intent here is to inspire reflection on the order of our thinking that plays itself out in the attitude and quality in our interaction with others. If you were thinking that ‘dating’ implies a romantic encounter, you are not incorrect in its fifth, sixth and eighth definition. However, there are four definitions that proceed the fifth and sixth, and one in between the sixth and the eighth, that are just as important and/or significant as the others. In the science of communication, it is our mental attitudes that display to ourselves which of these definitions come to mind first. I thought to start this post in this manner using the word ‘date’, purely as an example, to show (as a note to self with this word and many others in the English language) the inclination and/or habit of our mind and its thinking. Some of us, when talking about a very serious matter, tend to always infuse in the exchange humorous remarks that can be with good purpose while at other times it can bring the spirit or energy down in a derogatory manner.


Do you quirk or fidget when you are talking to one another? A quirk is: (Noun) “A peculiar behavioral habit.”; (Verb) “(with reference to a person's mouth or eyebrow) move or twist suddenly, especially to express surprise or amusement.” (Lexico dot com Powered by Oxford). This brings to my mind words from my father The Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad when saying that he studies the pattern in people’s behavior and when there is a change, that is when his antennas go up. Evidently, when we quirk it is an indication that in that moment something has surprised us or impacted us nonverbally. To fidget means: (Intransitive Verb) “Make small movements, especially of the hands and feet, through nervousness or impatience.”; “Make (someone) uneasy or uncomfortable.”; “A quick, small movement, typically a repeated one, caused by nervousness or impatience.”; “A person given to repeated nervous or impatient movements, especially one whom other people find irritating.”; “(usually fidgets) A state of mental or physical restlessness or uneasiness.” (Lexico dot com Powered by Oxford)


Again from the words of the Most Honorable Elijah Muhammad, who said that if you notice when speaking on Master Fard Muhammad, himself, or aspects of The Teachings and the listener becomes fidgety, checking their watch for the time or twitching in some way, you may be looking at a hypocrite in your midst. For all practical purposes, this may be a scientific way to probe and assess the mindset of the person or group that you’re addressing. Let’s face it, we all have a lot going on in our minds and certainly in our lifestyles. However, our reaction to different things and, primarily subject matters, are revealing signs to your real and truthful state of mind. Some subject matters evoke reactive characteristics that indicate displeasure while others indicate just the opposite. The scientific study here is objectively discerning the truth of the other person’s state of consciousness by their reaction to what they are receiving.


I have written about this in previous posts with the ‘fidgeting’ being comparable to the behavior displayed in movies or documentaries on persons experiencing demonic possession. Generally, the orientation of these movies like The Exorcist uses Catholic Priests as the agitant of the demonic spirit visibly possessed in the victim. Well, if we study through observation beyond the drama of the movie you will find that they are only depictions of what many people do when confronted by the ‘TRUTH’. There is natural conflict between Truth and falsehood so it is natural that unrighteous practicing persons would become uneasy and uncomfortable when presented with the Truth of not only their condition but the righteousness that they should otherwise be exhibiting. So the Holy Qur’an says “Nay, We hurl the Truth against falsehood, so it knocks out its brains, and lo! it vanishes...” (HQ 21:18).


An embattled person will generally be in denial of any critique to their disposition and their argument becomes a defense of their position while they know the presence of the Truth is ever weakening their false pretense. Many of us, in an effort not to lose a person who is dear to us, squander or compromise the Truth so as to not offend or lose our friendship with that deviant. Keep in mind that our initial disposition before the display of disbelief or hypocrisy by the other person in question should still be as in Surah 20 Verse 44 of the Holy Qur’an that says to Moses about Pharaoh “Then speak to him a gentle word, haply he may mind or fear”.


Remember, Islam is the practice of life that requires entire (not partial) submission to the Will and Way of ALLAH (God). The person who quirks or fidgets and always finds something else to distract them while in the presence of Truth is objectively indicating their momentary priority. If you are a Muslim then when discussing The Word of ALLAH and the exemplary guidance of His Messenger that you are initially giving ear to should never be displayed by a distracting thought, attitude or superimposed excuse that implies greater importance than ALLAH (God) the MOST HIGH! It is in these precise moments that our Islam, being Muslim, is displayed; it is when we show that the presence of ALLAH’s Truth takes precedence over anything else. This is also what is meant by taking your religion (practice of life) seriously. It is in the display of priorities. For too many of us in the practice of our lives and mold of communication, ALLAH (God) through His Word is simply not a priority which is why in some cases, you rarely ever hear it. This is in root why in our relationships, they are constantly in conflict and turmoil. We are not at peace because we are not of one mind. Remember, mind is the field of conscious energy that is produced by the thinking of our brain. Our interpersonal relationships are governed by the effect of whether or not we are Brothers, Sisters, family and people of the same mind. To bring peace, or create it, in any relationship, we must first bring for infusion in the atmosphere between us the remembrance of ALLAH (God) which is the greatest force and/or active power that will in fact vanish the brains of falsehood that prevents us from otherwise enjoying peace of mind and contentment. In both the Holy Qur’an and Bible, ALLAH (God) does not give us a passive prescription to act on when in the presence of deviation from righteousness.


A Believer in God is ‘Ordained’ in the Holy Qur’an to fight with those who fight with them. Too much pacification by the excuse that we give concerning how much we love the other person juxtaposes us to the instruction of ALLAH if you believe in Him, because mere belief goes for nothing if not carried into practice. Being hard on the disbeliever does not mean or equate to an aggressive assault as this form of aggression is not guided or protected by ALLAH (God). For this reason we are reminded and instructed to fight with those who fight with us. And in that struggle, we MUST hurl Truth at falsehood until it knocks out its brains (which means the very thinking of the deviant, disbeliever, or hypocrite). Knocking out the brains means knocking out or eradicating the thinking of the person in question... To Be Continued… 😇


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Very interesting topic. Brought to mind to study myself and others just to experiment with the principle to see how alert I am to behaviors in self and others. Looking forward to the continuation. Peace and Blessings!

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